Shooting Polar Bears Drowning With Fat Man in Bathtub

I understand what you mean about literal translation into languages. I'll give you the lines, and ask you to simply paraphrase as best you can for Chinese listeners. The information I give you will be very easy to remember and improvise. There won't be an "exact" line you have to remember or set your timing around. If we've got the executive burping in the bathtub with an arrow coming out of his neck, and you walking around wearing only the high boots and your cellphone, and you can say in Mandarin:

"Some people are filming, television, video, me in my black leather boots with an old guy in the bathtub who is hurt or bleeding or in bad shape, and I am supposed to say something about polar bears but I cannot translate it for you" . . .

If you can do this . . . We will be absolutely fine. Mistakes in grammar and syntax won't matter at all. But a Mandarin speaker has to be able to tell me that the chick in the video is trying to say something about polar bears and a world without ice. I guess you'll have to bring a dictionary?